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Disposable Identity

by Ophelia Sullivan

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1.
Hourglass 06:22
Tear my skin apart And rip my heart into pieces Thrust your will unto my soul I'm just another grain of sand Kept in your hourglass Kept in your hourglass Kept in your hourglass Crystal casket of fear My breath is dull in here The glass is melting from my side But oh timekeeper, you feed the cold It's so cold Cold in your hourglass Cold in your hourglass Cold in your hourglass As I run through your shivering hands I slip through the coil between two worlds Falling down unto your other side My time is up once more See you in time, see you in time, see you in time See you in time See you in time See you in time See you in time
2.
Disposable 06:58
Beg for mercy Hold your breath for me Beg for salvation Trembling beauty Let go of me Wait for redemption Enjoy your stay You'll be mine today Beg for salvation Plead for cruelty Give your skin to me Feed me oblivion Rain comes crashing down on your flesh to wash away All we were, make us faceless, erase us, create us Come taste my tears Through ecstatic spheres Come when I tell you to Don't speak, don't ask Void beneath this mask Don't remind me who I am Pain comes crashing down on your flesh to wash away All we were, make us faceless, erase us, create us I'm just as formless as are you You won't remember my voice Disposable identity Rain comes crashing down on my flesh to wash away All we were, make us nameless, erase us, create us Erase us Create us
3.
The Key 06:08
I had found a place for her to shed her skin and let it run The elixirs of ten thousand skies She was but an architect folding labyrinths of flesh and clouds All my colors shine in her eyes I had found a place for her to shed her skin and sculpt a fire Fueled by its contents, fragile perfection In the center of the coil I'd placed the contours of her soul Drenched in her substance, blessed by its light Painting moons unto the hemispheres Whisper spiral, whisper spiral Carving masks from bottled memories She's giving birth to herself Decomposed and disconnected from all the voices I had joined Forming a choir of lies and projections Ritualizing self-destruction till she made me see the sun Burning inside us, making us one The elixir, 10.000 skies All my colors shine in her eyes And in her eyes I've placed the substance That resonates in all of you who dare to cross the line and watch her Painting moons unto the hemispheres Whisper spiral, whisper spiral Carving masks from bottled memories I'm giving and giving Painting moons unto the hemispheres Whisper spiral, whisper spiral Carving masks from bottled memories She's giving birth to herself
4.
I feel it calling me I feel it pulling me deeper into your fear Am I just a mirror to your unfulfilled desire? Am I enough? I can't trust myself So you're scared, you're scaring me I'm not worthy of this I can barely hold myself together I can't trust myself yet Hang on love, why do I feel so Constantly on the edge of Losing you to your self-destruction? And as well fall the impact point is you And even though I'm dancing on open wounds I feel like myself when you touch me I feel like myself when you hold me I can't trust myself So I'm scared, I'm scaring you I'm not worthy of this I can barely hold myself together I can't trust myself yet Hold on star, why do I feel so Constantly on the edge of Losing myself to you? To you To you To you My love to you My love, my life force I can feel it calling me I can feel it calling me
5.
Fading 04:21
I found you Torn into pieces And I kept your shards Floating through my skies You were small Yet ever so powerful And you saw right through me Falling through the coil Those eyes watching it all fading Those eyes watching it all fading Those eyes watching it all fading Those eyes watching it all fading
6.
Blue 05:57
So I float through my skies And collect tainted clouds Stained with truths that turned lies Suffocate from my doubts So I drift through your seas Feeling cold and displaced For the surface starts to freeze I hold on to your taste on my lips So we run in circles To protect each other The air is getting thin It's my turn to smother, be reborn As quickly as I saw through you My world slowly turns to blue As quickly as I saw through you My world slowly turns to blue As quickly as I saw through you My world slowly turns to blue
7.
The Game 07:13
This skin is a playground While this soul is a battlefield When you inhale it's me you're breathing in Breathing out Open your eyes to see that maze of broken dreams Let me inside, please make me feel I need you to be as real as I can never be Play with me Play with me Play with me Play with me, please play with me You choose the weapons, I build the game Please play with me, don't believe your eyes You choose the weapons, I'll wake you when it's over Play with me Play with me Play with me
8.
You lay next to me And gently crossed the line While I kissed my fears goodbye To keep you safe for one night Hear my heart Singing to you with its warmth With your warmth you reminded me My soul is love My voice is love My face is love My core is love You lay in my arms Embraced the ghosts I brought into your bed While I touched the essence of your soul With my love I can't be the suffering anymore I can't be the suffering anymore I can't be the suffering anymore Burn my shell of suffering Cause you reminded me My core is love My core is love My core is love My core is love My core is love My core is love My core is love My core is love
9.
Core 07:21
Reflections of our ever crossing paths Blinding us both Running through our veins Breathing up our air Still I cling to the origin Nourishing my self-conception Cherishing your vague reflection Burned into my core

about

After years of activity in electronic and experimental music, Ophelia Sullivan starts a new chapter in their musical journey with their new solo project at the intersection of electronic music, band music and orchestral music. Its stylistic components include but are not limited to Post-Progressive, Avant-Pop, Trip Hop, Electronica and Post-Rock. Ophelia's music is never confined to a single genre - the central idea is juxtaposing and merging supposedly unrelated styles.

The debut album "Disposable Identity" is the culmination of eight years of work. First drafts of some of the songs were already written in 2014/2015, continuously revisited and revised over the years, but it took until 2021 for Ophelia to begin the actual production process. They collaborated with a long list of talented guest instrumentalists and recorded string arrangements with a small orchestra as well as with a string quartet.

Contrast is at the heart of the album - light and dark, hard and soft, restless and hypnotic. Lyrically, it is an extremely personal journey through Ophelia Sullivan's biography and deals with themes of mental health, otherness, sexuality and vulnerability through a decidedly queer lense.

credits

released October 30, 2023

Composed, produced and mixed by Ophelia Sullivan
Mastered by Alexander Dietz at Chemical Burn Studios
Cover Art by Viyan Land

Vocals & Programming (all tracks): Ophelia Sullivan
Guitars (tracks 1, 2, 3, 6, 7 and 9): Ophelia Sullivan
Guitars (tracks 1, 2, 3, 6, and 7): Vanessa Jung
Piano (tracks 2, 3, 5, 8 and 9): Daniel Gräupner
Drums (tracks 2, 3 and 9): Fenix Gayed
Additional Guitar (track 9): Mo Harris Sommer
Cello (tracks 1, 3 and 8): Anne Gayed
Viola (tracks 1, 3 and 8): Bettina Kegler
Violin I (tracks 1, 3 and 8): Verena Heittmann
Violin II (tracks 1, 3 and 8): Ivan Dario Rendon Poveda
Double Bass (track 8): Christian Gayed
Strings recording engineer (tracks 1, 3 and 8): Jonas Piknias
Additional violin (track 1): Ophelia Sullivan
Cello (tracks 4 and 7): Constantin Meier, Attila Hündöl & Bianca Breitfeld
Viola (tracks 4 and 7): Alex Brutsch, Marcin Niziol & Natascha Stromer
Violin I (tracks 4 and 7): Klaus Marquard, Christiane Hajek, Johannes
Krampen & Kamilla Busch
Violin II (tracks 4 and 7): Isabel Zimmer, Lisa Barry, Kimberly Crawford & Kathrin Bscheidl
Orchestral recording producer (tracks 4 and 7): Florian Sitzmann & Ophelia Sullivan
Orchestral recording engineer (tracks 4 and 7): Dennis Kopacz

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about

Ophelia Sullivan Leipzig, Germany

Ophelia Sullivan is a composer, producer and musician, previously known for their work in experimental electronic music.
Ophelia Sullivan writes songs at the intersection of band sound, electronic sound and orchestral sound. Mixing elements of Post-Progressive, Avant-Pop, Trip Hop, Post-Rock and Electronica, a unique sound emerges, sincere and all-consuming.
... more

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